Sandy Lying Down in Peace, Part 1

Sandy grew up in a very turbulent home. Her father was a violent alcoholic who beat her so severely that eight times she landed in the hospital for broken bones from his rages. Her mother was cold and indifferent. She constantly criticized family members for the slightest things. Sandy knew about the Lord but had no interest in ever getting to know Him. “If my parents don’t love me,” she felt, “why would God?”

Many times Sandy ran away from home. Many nights she slept on train tracks praying for a train to come and put her out of her misery. She tried taking her life for the first time at nine, then 11, and then at 13 years old. “My last try,” she recalls, “consisted of a sure-fire plan. I gathered all sorts of pills I found in my home and hid them in my bedroom closet. One night I mixed up a pitcher of strawberry Kool-Aid and consumed them all. Then I fell asleep.”

A couple of hours later she awoke in severe pain. Her heart was racing uncontrollably; she was dripping in sweat and felt pins and needles pricking her all over. Though she was panting and shaking, her mind was still clear. In this state she tearfully cried out to God, “Why haven’t You saved me from all this abuse? Why haven’t You protected me? What is the point of being here just to be tortured? What good am I?”

A voice suddenly spoke to her heart. “How do you know God hasn’t protected you? Most children your size would not have lived through all your beatings. God loves you more deeply than you’ll ever know. He has plans for your life to prosper you and lift you up. He will never leave you!” After this she fell back to sleep.

In the morning Sandy felt perfectly well. At first she thought she had only dreamed of what she tried to do. But the evidence of the pitcher and empty pill packets lying around convinced her that an angel from heaven had spoken to her and saved her life. “I could even still taste the bitterness of the medicine in my mouth,” she remembers. This dramatic encounter started her on a journey to discover God in the Bible.

Reflect: Have you ever felt so discouraged that you wanted to end it all? Never forget that Jesus will never leave you or forsake you.

Key Bible Texts

Let your conversation be without covetousness; and be content with such things as ye have: for he hath said, I will never leave thee, nor forsake thee. (Hebrews 13:5 KJV)